Cleaning out my closet... | Return to Sender: Letters to the World

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I did something really important tonight. Something I have never fully done before in my life.

I got rid of all the clothes I own that I was keeping for “when I lose weight.”

Phew. It feels good to talk about it. And I know you all know what I mean. Those dresses that still have the tags on them – they never fit, but you didn’t want to return them. Or that favorite dress that hasn’t fit in over a year, but you still hold on to it. Ya know, for when you lose weight. But tonight, as I was putting away some clothes, I decided I didn’t want those anymore. My closet should be my haven. I should open it and see all of my favorite things. My secretary dresses. All of my blazers. My crazy sweater dress and 1970s prom dress. I should look into my closet and see the dresses that don’t fit and the blazers that don’t button and feel guilty. I had dresses I refused to try on because I KNEW they didn’t fit, and I didn’t want to feel bad about myself. I love fashion. I want to love EVERYTHING in my closet.

How can I actually love myself if I am still holding on to things for “when I lose weight”? It’s such a horrible way of thinking. Such a hurtful way of thinking. It means I don’t love myself or my body.

So I just started pulling things off the hanger and making a giant pile on my bed. Patterned shirtwaist dresses, sequined vest, shift dresses, an aqua marine 70s dress…until had a pile big enough to fill a garbage bag. And then I looked in my closet.

I could wear everything in it. Every dress fit me. Every shirt buttoned. And every blazer’s sleeves came down to my wrists. I could put on anything on I wanted in that closet. I can’t really describe the feeling it I had. Less burdened. Like this clothes were literally weighing me down, and now that I was rid of them, I was free. Free of the guilt. Free of the shame.

So then I started organizing. Mind you, this is all at 1:00 am while I am waiting for Carl to get out of work so we can play with the dogs and feed the hamster pieces of apple. So, I came up with a system that makes absolutely no sense, but these are the current sections in my closet:

Fancy dresses
Mod dresses
Polka dot dresses
Solid Color Dresses
Patterned Dresses
Secretary Dresses
Denim Dresses
Blazers
Sweaters

I mean, what type of system is that? It goes from material, to color, to style. It should be ONE category with different sub-categories…but no, those are the categories in my closet. Regardless, I just want to bury myself in it. Or at least give all of my clothes a really big hug. Or throw them a party to say thank you for being mine and fitting my body.

So in the end, it wasn’t me that needed to lose weight. It was my closet.

http://itallchanges.wordpress.com Cynthia (It All Changes)

This is a great post! I love that you love you the way you are and your clothes reflect that…ALL of them
Cynthia (It All Changes)´s last [type] ..When I Was 17…
Emma

Yay! Good for you!

I have also done this so I know how good it feels!

I was chatting to a girl who worked in a department store a couple of months ago and she told me she was shocked at the number of people who deliberately bought clothes that were too small for them. She said it was a daily occurrence that someone would say “I’ll shrink into it” (or something similar)to her as they were purchasing their item. This also happens across all sizes, regular and plus size.

It makes me sad to think that so many people are paying for clothes just so they can put themselves down when they look at the item.

P.S. Added Bonus: More room in closet = Can get more clothes!
http://www.elizabeth-o-no.blogspot.com Elizabeth

Good for you! I did the same recently when we moved. I gave the clothes away to my sister and friends and it felt awesome!
http://www.sweetfacedstyle.blogspot.com Anika

Feels great no? I did the same a few years back, and now I treat my closet as a candy store, all lovely things sorted by colour shopping in my own closet has its perks!

xx Anika
Anika´s last [type] ..Stylish blogawards and confessions
http://bargainfatshionista.blogspot.com Annissa

The title of this post really worried me!

Anyway, going through your closet is definitely a liberating feeling. I did it before I moved and donated two giant black garbage bags full! Just of things that no longer or never did fit me! Goodness.
Annissa´s last [type] ..Makeup part deux
Jennifer

I did this a year 18 months ago. It’s amazing what a great feeling it is and how much better you feel. Congrats!
http://fatheffalump.wordpress.com sleepydumpling

I rotate everything in my wardrobe. When I wash something, it goes in on the right side, closest to the opening of the door. When I am choosing an outfit, I take something from the left side. Then I ask myself the following questions:

Can I wear it today?

Yes, good, I will wear it.

No? Why not?

It’s not appropriate for what I’m doing today. Ok, you can stay.
It’s the wrong season (too cold, too hot). Ok, you can stay.
I would wear it but I just don’t feel like it. You can stay, but if I hear you say “I don’t feel like it.” again, I’m going to ask you why not.

It doesn’t fit me. OUT YOU GO!
I don’t like it any more. OUT YOU GO!
It’s uncomfortable. OUT YOU GO!
I feel stupid/dorky/ridiculous/weird when I wear it. OUT YOU GO!

That way, all of my clothes get worn, and I regularly cull things that I don’t wear for whatever reason.

It’s a good feeling to open your wardrobe and know whatever you put your hand on is something you love and will wear.
sleepydumpling´s last [type] ..Opting Out of the Game
http://www.amyblam.com AmyBlam

I totally think this is the most amazing idea ever and I wish I could do it.
I love clothes. I love shoes. I love fashion.
But other than things that I completely hate or are totally worn out-I have the hardest time getting rid of things.
And without fail, six months down the line I’m always-why did I get rid of those shoes-they’d be perfect right now. Argh.
I have way too much stuff, and lots that doesn’t currently fit. I turned our fourth bedroom into a closet room.
I know life would be so much easier if I knew I could just grab and wear whatever I have but I can’t figure out how to part with things.
Loved the blog.
http://missemmamm.com Mary

I love that your closet is full of dresses!
http://ilikesocks.com/ B. Zedan

That is so awesome! Dang, there is nothing quite like the feeling one gets after thoroughly cleaning out the closet. And you have the bonus of creating a happier (so happy! it sounds like you have the best dress collection ever!) space for your clothes.

I also think it is pretty great that you have enough “mod” and “secretary” dresses to create categories for them.
B. Zedan´s last [type] ..Double take dupes
bigbeautyfulmess

you go girl !!!
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http://wolfwhistle.org Amy

It’s not accepting my comment! Forgive me if you get two the same from me, but I really really wanted to say: you go, girl! This made me really happy to read.
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http://www.pasazz.net Sarah

Great post! Cleaning out your closet this way is sooo liberating. It might be daunting at first, but it is truly liberating. I’ve done this a while back and do not regret it at all!
Sarah´s last [type] ..The Full-Figured Style Workbook – Book of the Week
http://leiasdelights.com Leia

Okay, you are very brave for doing this. But I just CAN’T! I’m still keeping things for ‘when I lose weight’ but I really AM trying to lose, and AM being able to wear some of the stuff I put aside a year ago! So I’m not THAT crazy… right??
http://circle-meets-square.blogspot.com/ Alecto

wow, that must have been incredibly liberating. i also clean at silly times of night, it’s a bit of a relief to know that i’m not the only one
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http://clothesinteralia.blogspot.com gina

I finally just cleared out my closet of things that don't fit. I couldn't quite bear to get rid of them all, but I put them in some old suitcases and stuffed them in the back of a storage closet. Now, I've only put the weight on in the last year and a half, after 15 years of being the same size, so it's reasonable to think that I may take it off in the next few months to a year, now that I've recently started paying more attention to my diet and activity level. But it's crazy to have all that stuff in my closet that just doesn't fit, or isn't flattering anymore even if I can zip it up. It the suitcases languish in the back of the closet for a year or 2 or 3, and I don't lose weight, then I'll finally actually get rid of everything in them.